Wednesday, February 27, 2008

Finding the Center

The last eight days have been tough. I'm nearing the end of my pregnancy and my days at work before my maternity leave are drawing to a close. I have been suffering with a horrible viral infection that my husband, daughter, and most of my co-workers have also had--marked with chest congestion, head congestion, fever, sneezing. Only, being that I'm pregnant, I have had limited abilities to treat the symptoms. I spent Friday home on the couch blowing a very red and irritated nose all day long and praying for a nap, only for sleep to elude me.

My pregnancy is going extremely well, and although the doctors have been watching me like a hawk for early signs of pre-eclampsia (which I suffered with during the last three pregnancies), I have yet to develop even the slightest abnormalities! Unfortunately, I have also been very sleep deprived as of late, which although I know is not uncommon, has not really aided me well in terms of fighting this cold or dealing with any of the other stressors in my life.

I have come to the computer several times in the last eight days longing to leave something for you, only to go away frustrated because I was too tired to write, or because I couldn't find my center enough to write anything that would bless or encourage. And tonight, as I left a comment on Lysa TerKeurst's blog about how I had wanted to write but was unable to--it hit me.

I have lost my center.

In the midst of all that goes on in our lives, as Christians our center should always be easy to find. Our stronghold, our rock, our Redeemer is in Jesus Christ. And although I have prayed about the various things going on in my life, I have lost my centering in Christ. I really need Him in my life first and foremost to make sense of the madness around me, and to give me peace.

"I am leaving you with a gift-peace of mind and heart. And the peace I give isn't like the peace the world gives. So don't be troubled or afraid. "
John 14:27 NLT
I need this kind of peace right now. And I know that the only way that I can find it is to seek it from Jesus. So, although I don't have a formula for getting there, I am seeking this peace right now. And it is my prayer that I will not find myself wandering away from it again anytime soon.
And, if it helps you the way it helps me, here is a clip of the song, "Jesus, Be the Center"--my Pastor's favorite praise song, and one that I am comforted by right now.

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