If I thought it wouldn't hurt you...

There are times when my mind rushes with things that I would love to say or write or shout. And unfortunately, most of the time, I either never say them, or I simply pray them off to God. It's not that I don't want to tell you. I do. But I don't want to hurt you with words that are careless, poorly thought out, or whose motive is nothing more than tearing you apart.

Sometimes I'm just irritated and I want to say something that is mean-spirited and ultimately irrelevant. But I don't (most of the time, at least) because I know that the wrongly stated and timed word can change the world for a lifetime. Often, I want to say something in response to something you've said to me that hurt me. But I won't because something reaches out to me and reminds me that two wrongs don't make a right. And sometimes, like right now, I have something that I really want to say, but I know that it could be taken the wrong way simply because I know that when I have heard these words spoken to myself, it has hurt or offended me deeply.

So, if I thought it wouldn't hurt you, I would write or tell you right this instant what is going on in my heart and my head. I would tell you to back off, to mind your own business, to get a life, or whatever would be most appropriate in the situation. I suppose the blessing in all of this is that still small voice that reminds me that I should speak in love.

"A gentle answer turns away wrath, but harsh words stir up anger."

--Proverbs 15:1 NLT

Please do not take my silence to equal anger. Most of the time my silence is nothing but an action of love for you and for our relationship. Prayerfully considered words, I have found, are far better received than those spoken in haste.

That's what I would say, if I thought it wouldn't hurt you...