Explaining child labor to children...AKA Don't bother trying!

We are now approaching the week mark to my due date, and we have three children who are anxiously awaiting the big day. Mind you, Ms. B (11), Mr. M (10), and Mr. J (7) are old enough to understand patience, to some extent. They are masters of the countdown thanks to Advent Calendars and other holiday countdown rituals. But I have been unable to convince them that Baby EM is not magically just going to show up on her due date!

How long will you have to push her out? asked Ms. B yesterday.

Uhm, hopefully not too long, I answered in infinite wisdom.

More than four hours?

I pray to the Lord NOT! I responded.


And from Mr. J:
What's that line on your belly, Mommy?

What line? I don't see a line, I insisted.

Those, pointing to the fifty zillion faint white and pink stretch marks on my stomach.

Those are stretch marks, Mommy informed him.

Where'd you get them?

You! (Mommy tries hard not to cry!)


And Mr. M:
What if you go into labor while we're at school?

What do you mean?

Who's going to let us into the house?

(Mommy at this point lists about 25 possible different people from the neighborhood, family, church, etc. who could/would/should/might be able to help if such a thing actually happens. Unfortunately, the kids have a half day tomorrow and are off school all next week for spring break. The odds are strong that they will be home ALL DAY when I go into labor. Thank God for Aunt Brenda!)

So secretly, I'm hoping that birth and pregnancy will serve many lessons for our children, although after some of the questions we've fielded, my hopes aren't as high as they had been. I do secretly hope that it will serve as a great lesson for abstinence for the older two, at the very least. While we love babies around here, we hope they wait another 15 years or more to even consider having their own!